hammerfell | two [video/action for Route 39 area]

[Oh hey it's shakycam time. Though whether it's because the Gear is being held by a rather small creature finding it hard to stabilize the camera or because of the GROUND SHAKING, well, you'll have to decide for yourself.

The tail end of an Onix falls into view, slamming into the ground and causing another jolt in the camera, which pans up to the giant rock snake's equally giant head--all 22 feet of somehow living stone rearing up and staring down at...

Thor. Who's grinning madly, hair wild around his head, bracing himself for...oh shit the Onix is lunging is he not going to move?

Nope. Instead of splatting, or even screaming in terror, Thor's hands meet the Onix's face--he twists and forces the snout to the ground. And then he laughs.]

I have bested you again, my friend, though I fear tis only because you allow it.

[There's some good-natured grumbling from the Onix as Thor rubs one of the ridges above its eyes.]

Perhaps someday I will be able to offer more of a challenge for you.

[The camera falls, landing on its side half-propped up in the grass, as an enthusiastic Pichu wearing a red bandana cape leaps out from behind it, squeaking and attaching itself to the Onix's horn, then a blue paw covers the video before it cuts out.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

hammerfell

I would not be so sure.

[His Avenger shield brothers might have something to say about that, man.]

Your assumption that I am human, however, is erroneous. I am Asgardian.

[oh god Thor and Armstrong being bros, leave me to die.]

From:

lieutenantantichrist

You wanna try it, be my guest, but don't come crying to me when a pinecone explodes in your face.

[Blake's face falls and his voice goes flat.]

You're what.

From:

hammerfell

[...that just makes him curious, Blake. IT WILL BE YOUR FAULT WHEN HE POKES A PINECO.]

I am of Asgard. Tis another realm, separate from your Earth.

From:

lieutenantantichrist

[What did he just say?]

[He throws his hands up]

So you're an alien too. Fine, you'll fit right in, I bet they have potlucks.

In the meantime, quit talking like that. The Midsummer Night's Dream auditions were last week.

From:

hammerfell

[He likes Tony's sarcasm much better, it isn't as mean-spirited.

Also, yay more references he doesn't get.]

I am not 'auditioning', nor shall I change my manner of speaking.

From:

lieutenantantichrist

[Mean spirit is the only spirit Blake has.]

You wanna sound like somebody from a Renaissance Fair, that's your business. It's a free...island.

What's an Azguard supposed to be, anyway? You look pretty human from here.

From:

hammerfell

Indeed, my appearance is that of a human, even without this world's interference. I am led to understand that it influences the shape of people drawn here, and impresses upon them a human form.

[It's amazing how much more patient he's gotten with explaining these things.]

We Asgardians are rather long-lived compared to humans, stronger, and many of us are sensitive to magic, if not able to harness it in some way.

From:

lieutenantantichrist

Yeah, there's plenty of people who claim they used to be something else. More like it impresses on them some lithium.

[That sounds reasonable right up until the last part. Blake has really got to stop getting his hopes up]

You're fuckin' indigo children.

From:

hammerfell

You are in another world, yet you find this so difficult to believe?

[He doesn't know what lithium is but he can get the general tone of your 'NOPE'. As for the 'children' comment, he laughs. Even if he is kinda wondering why you're calling him purple.]

I am older than yourself, as well as ten generations of your forebears, and I am considered young by Asgardian reckoning. The only man to call me a child in centuries is my own father.

From:

lieutenantantichrist

One piece of impossible bullshit coming true doesn't mean everything else is going to.

[Blake gives him a long look.]

[Yep. Raving nuts, though he's calm and cheerful about it instead of cringing and babbling. People here seem to take their own lunacy pretty well.]

What are you trying to do, one-up the guy who says he's ninety-four?

From:

hammerfell

Perhaps not, though it does mean the mind should remain open to the possibility.

[He wore out all the ranting and raving last time he was turned human okay.]

Captain Rogers? Nay, he is my shield brother and in many ways far more respectable than myself. I would not presume such things. I am doing no more than speaking the truth, though you obviously do not believe me.

[To be fair, Thor, in your civvies you look more like a Canadian lumberjack than a Norse god.]

From:

lieutenantantichrist

Anybody who tells you to keep an open mind either wants to covert you to some religion or sell you something.

[Captain Rogers...and the guy said his name was Steve before...why does that sound familiar?]

[Probably just because it's common as hell.]

Oh, scuse me, Captain 94-year-old.

He's your brother?

From:

hammerfell

[If you say so.]

A shield brother is a fellow warrior whom you have stood alongside in battle.

[Patiently explaining. Don't you know anything?]

I do have a brother, however, he is not here.

[That's for the best.]

From:

lieutenantantichrist

You mean a partner. Somebody you trust to watch your back.

[Blake's mouth tightens for a second before he refocuses on the blond guy.]

[back to good old sarcasm.]

You fought Nazis together?

Good thing. We don't need a rocksnake-wrestling family tag team.

From:

hammerfell

[Close enough.]

Indeed.

[Thor's head tilts, he knows not these 'Nazis' of which you speak.]

Nay, our enemy was the Chitauri.

[And his brother. Um. Awkward.]

...fear not. Loki would not participate in such games.

From:

lieutenantantichrist

[Blake tries to make some sense out of that gibberish word.] Cheetahs?

[something else grabs his attention.] You did not just fucking say nay.

[Even Blake recognizes that name.]

Your brother's name is Loki? Christ, your parents must have had something against him.

From:

hammerfell

[Patiently:]

Chitauri. An army of creatures from the other side of the galaxy.

[Be disbelieving all you like, Thor will just continue to look guileless and honest.]

Is my manner of speaking that strange to you?

['Cause too bad, he's not going to change it. As for the comment about Loki, his face drops.]

Loki is an honorable name.

[...or it was until Loki got a hold of it.]

He has many quarrels with our parents, but his name is not one of them.

From:

lieutenantantichrist

[This sigh comes from the very bottom of Carter's heart.]

Aliens. Of course.

Are they the obnoxious ones who type weird? Beating up some of those would do everybody a favor.

Honorable, sure. That's something Frank Zappa would call his kid, if he was into...what is it, Greek mythology?

From:

hammerfell

[you and your strange references.]

No.

[...not going into any further explanation because seriously he does not have the patience for it.]

Twas the Norsemen, who told such tales.

From:

lieutenantantichrist

[Come on, if you're a thousand you're old enough to know Zappa]

Vikings and shit? So your family's way into those?

From:

hammerfell

[Old enough? Yes. From an entirely separate plane of the universe? Also yes. Zappa apparently does not cross interplanetary boundaries.]

It would perhaps be more accurate to say that the Vikings were 'way into' our family.

[Come on Blake, keep up. The Viking age was barely started, historically speaking, a thousand years ago.]

Edited Date: 2013-05-03 01:01 pm (UTC)

From:

lieutenantantichrist

[Well if anyone would...]

[Real old, not human, Vikings, that name.]

[Blake's eyebrows move down, then jump up]

No no no.

You are not claiming what I think you are.

From:

hammerfell

I am Thor Odinson, prince of Asgard. Your ancient people indeed hailed me--and the rest of my people--as gods. I fear they told legends we could hardly live up to, however.

[He is claiming exactly that, sorry sir.]

From:

lieutenantantichrist

[Carter rubs his head.]

Sure you are. Now all we need's a Lincoln, a Napoleon, and a couple Jesuses.

What is it with crazies and religion?

From:

hammerfell

I have already well established that I retain my mind, just as you have repeated that you do not believe me. We seem to be at an impasse in that regard.

[Plus, he came before the religion, geeze.]

When I was a younger man, I would travel to Earth with my companions, do battle with trespassers from other realms. Our strength and command of magic--my brother's illusions, my lightning--garnered attention, and the tales took their own life from there.